Who's Reading This Blog? Thousands Of You Are. See The Numbers. Plus: Great Music Rankings.
While I don't really look at or react to this much, it's kind of neat to see once in a while. Nearly a million people have seen pages on this blog and around 100,000 pages a month and 3000 pages a day are viewed. I don't really compete with this blog and it's more a repository of freestyled thoughts that I find interesting.
Another neat stat is my music site has been hovering around the low-teens in rankings over the last week or two and is currently at #12 out of hundreds of Hip Hop/Rock/Alternative artists in Toronto on ReverbNation so I'm happy about that. As people add themselves to my mailing list I'll start sending and posting on it more.
Back to this blog, to get my pop-culture cred I've been catching up on a bit of TV with my roommate as well using Netflix, possibly the most brilliant time-sucking innovation since the pet rock. I'm glad I don't have regular control over it, because if I had the time and means, like many I could just stay fried out of my gourd glued to the boob-tube soaking in the new golden age of television and mixing it up with movies, specials and documentaries in a gloriously self-destructive spiral of vicarious existence at the expense of my own. Don't think I'm not considering it too. Once I got fat-stacks and a fat-sack for something noteworthy, I'm so there.
My recent TV experience includes seeing most of the last two seasons of "Breaking Bad", a generally acclaimed and fantastic series that's been gushed over a bajillion times and, from what I can tell from relatively few episodes, for good reason. I liked Season 4 the most from while Season 5 dragged a bit at times, but it's still among the best shows I've seen. I can even relate to some of Walter White's excesses as he went from dis-empowered and worried to nigh-omnipotent and well-respected in his own weird way.
This is where I get some cathartic crap out that's been bugging everybody. Just like me. So, here I go for it.
While "Mr. White" said repeatedly that everything he did he did for his family, by the end of the series he admitted that wasn't true and in-part he did it because he liked it and was good at it. This reminds me a bit of how I felt later on about my now long given-up counter-PSYOP work to help people communicate better and feel as masculine and feminine as they want to so they could help empower each other verbally and non-verbally while stopping many from turning into pushy, nervous, sketchy, rude, twitchy, spazzy, zombie and gender-neutralized creepy creatures who quietly bother, freak-out and threaten each other more and more every day like losers harassing losers without admitting it. Or, maybe nothing like this is happening.
Keep in mind I like people and always have. I just hate rude behaviour and always have. So... that's that.
Either way, I try to ignore it and keep my high standards and good mood, which I recommend for everyone.
As I've mentioned in the past, all it would take is for enough people to push back to change this. So let's try.
Anyway, acting male, female, gay, straight, polite, relaxed, relaxing and respectful I can vibe with, and when people are doing it well I don't mind and can hardly tell. Like, when a tall graceful guy approached me on the sidewalk politely and I treated him like a girl until I realized he was just doing it well, which I was fine with since it wasn't aggressive or unpleasant. But, this other stuff sucks and the way most people are buying and selling it they know it too. While I was genuinely concerned, especially for women and children who are often more threatened by our general descent into a perverted mosh pit and who will be hell for men to deal with anyway with all this going on (see below), when I couldn't get paid to continue trying to fix it and found it socially and financially isolating, I had to keep giving up and now finally have save for the odd post like this one. A good reason to give up is nearly everyone is now habitually acting rude and constantly messing each other up, so it keeps getting much, much harder to casually and sometimes even formally interact with many.
Since this is happening faster and faster as people move faster and faster to mess with each other, I generally now find myself ignoring most people in front and around me on the sidewalk when I walk around. This is something noticed but not discussed by many and nobody's really surprised even if some do get a bit upset.
Sometimes people fail to freak me out and then walk into or bump into me, so I still mostly ignore them and say something like "you did that on purpose and I just ignore people acting rude" and keep going. While this happens a few times a day and often works okay on neutral territory, I got sent home from work today after a different manager than my own aggressively walked towards me and I turned away to ignore her and my backpack bumped into her and I refused to apologize. I guess my manager had to try to save her colleague's face and I had to try to save mine, but I don't think I did with nearly everyone quietly "gaslighting" each other.
FYI, This is an old slang term from an Alfred Hitchcock film ("Gaslight") where a husband tries to drive his wife crazy by moving things around in their house and claiming they were always there when she noticed and making her think she's crazy for thinking different. Since I hate being disrespected, I don't play along and can generally and safely ignore most efforts. But, as people get more aggressive in their desire to get looked at acting uglier and crazier... it gets harder. People forcing you to look at them act all messed-up and freaking out to communicate something while they try to mess you up isn't fun for anyone involved even though many are getting obsessed with it. Again, maybe none of this is happening. So, consider this stuff a work of fiction.
In this quietly parallel universe that may or may-not exist, it's actually way easier to deal with guys who know they're full of crap and pulling crap than with women who simply think they worked hard to look good and this is what they're supposed to do and expect to get credit for it. Or, take aggro-sketchy crap out on you.
Plus, I've seen situations where there's nothing but busy men saying and doing stuff and this behaviour can be calmed down fairly easily. But, after all the gender-bending brainwashing, social constipation often lead by women trained to help shut men up and men's aggressive and competitive interactions messed up all the chicks, many think they can pull any crap they want and get away with it with their own double-standard, or demand to be respected for their disrespectful behaviour. I generally feel sorry for everyone since nobody really wants to act like this, but it's a lot different then feel sorry for starving African children who you can look at and sympathize with since it's generally hard to relax and feel for people acting more pushy and rude.
I'd love to ignore this and never speak about or deal with it again, but since people often know me or can see I'm polite and want to say hello, I see it all around me happening every day as people mess each other up more and more and more all the time and I catch the worst of it. I'm not crying about it, but it's annoying.
The last words on this for now: as men get more feminine, women get less feminine, which in turn makes all of us less feminine since men try to copy women they're competing with and messing up, so more of us get more frustrated by our situations. While it started as compensation for communication issues, nearly all male and female body language now looks the same, which is horrible, which most people seem to know by how they sell it or try to force you to look at it, so there's obviously no reason to look at it. Or, I often agree with people who don't think I want to see what they're trying to show me and so don't look at it, so we should have no problems since we both think the same thing and simply react the way we should. And that's that.
Other shows I've seen include "Dexter" as I catch a few episodes of the last seasons. While I can't speak as authoritatively on it, I think it's also a great show and caught some episodes where he met the doctor who help create him and channel his psychopathy into something useful. But, having not owned a TV or regularly watched one for 10 years, I'm still shocked at how casual violence and gore and to a lesser extent sex are displayed on the dozens of shows about cops trying to catch serial killers. It really looks like dehumanizing and psychopath-training to me that's possibly part of a much bigger predictive programming agenda by the proverbial "man" and his or their control of our culture creation industry. Or maybe it's not, so like, whatever.
The same is true for "Orange Is The New Black" where I'm getting used to seeing women at their worst and dehumanized on a regular basis in a way that's oddly more overtly humanizing and subtly dehumanizing than even porn since you get to know the characters well. While I don't want anyone peeing their pants because they like these shows and don't want to feel bad; or because they don't want to have to know this angle and possibly feel compelled to tell anyone else these thoughts; this is where our old generally gender-identifiable roles can come in handy to make us both feel better. While men and women can do whatever they want, or forget how to and never be able to again, we still have options if we still want them. While the following is quickly changing, possibly for the worse, generally speaking men are better at calling "bullsh-t" and more aggressively challenging it to make sure neither they nor their women and children are messed up by it, while women are more conflict-averse and would prefer not to challenge big ideas as often. While we're moving to a world where nobody wants to call any of this crap out, as I've mentioned before, it's one way to save us.
On that note, here are some lyrics:
"Rape and kill,
White girls, on TV,
Chop 'em up, again,
Just, to say, it's kind of neat?
That's not, "just life", or "don't watch",
That's, some hardcore, mind-control,
With, intelligent thoughts,
Smart enough, to play dumb,
When, she trades soft,
Smart enough, to have fun,
When, he wants, to pop-off,
To keep, from takin' it, straight,
Up the wazoo, gettin' soft,
Now, just a man,
Speakin' his mind,
Naw, not "just" a man, or stuck,
With a horse's behind,
Perhaps, you think, I'm a fool,
But, since ya thinkin',
Know, my balls,
Got, gravitational pull...
This what you want?"
- Black Krishna, "Party In The Dot"