"Dear John Kerry: My Husband Still Beats Me, Do You Know A Good Lawyer? - Thanks, America"

"I think Kerry could've ended it all last night [in the 3rd debate], simply by countering the aura of unreality coming from the other side". - Jon Stewart on CSPAN (not Crossfire), 25/Oct/04

"Secretary of State Kenneth Blackwell certified Bush as the winner Monday based on official results from county election boards, with the final tally of 2.86 million votes for the Republican, or about 51 percent of the vote, and 2.74 million or 49 percent for Democrat John Kerry." - Associated Press, COLUMBUS, Ohio - Dec 7, 2004

It's over Johnny, it's over.

Endless miles of travel mussing $100 haircuts, endless miles of tortured souls bleating in fear and hope, endless miles of ploughsharing for peace that could've made you an Oval Office All-Star... over. In fact, if you won, all you had to do was stop doing everything Bush is doing and hit the crack-pipe for the next four years, and you'd still be a hero to many in comparison.

It was that easy.

Of course, you were campaigning against a team who successfully accused triple-amputee Max Cleland of being unpatriotic for not losing a 4th limb in Vietnam.

Okay, maybe it wasn't that easy.

So, what did you do? It's tough to tell really, as one man's genius is another man's fool. But, hindsight is 20/20, and we can see you lost, so to quote one of the great leaders in history: "Only failure needs excuses, success speaks for itself". Unfortunately Adolph Hitler said that, but it's still a good quote. In fact, he had a bunch of good ones, including "The broad mass of a nation will more easily fall victim to a big lie than a small one." (Oh Adolph, you're so cute when you're insanely right!)

I guess playing along with Bush's scare tactics seemed like a good idea, and it likely won you the Democratic nomination. Then came the campaign, and the press was certainly amused at your stiff cries of "doubling the troops!" and "securing our ports!", nigh-identical policies which were only theoretically more effective while undeniably more expensive. We know that "tax-and-spend liberal" is one of the enduring myths of our time, and when up against a "spend-and-spend conservative" obliterating the Clinton-surplus with a $12 trillion swing into debt to provide tax-cuts for the rich, you stepped in a bear-trap of history. Next time, give them what they want, now. They all drive SUV's and pop antacids instead of eating less anyway, so you think they give a crap about tomorrow?

In fact, screw those guys. In fact, screw this nit-pickey nonsense.

You know what's really infuriating? We know more today about what we don't know than we ever have before, and yet most of us don't. You know what I mean?

To clarify, I'll quote The X-Files: "The Truth is Out There". It's in magazines, newspapers, best-selling books, the BBC, the Guardian UK, the London Observer (Go Brits Go!), an almost unreleased documentary that grossed $250 million... oh yeah, it's out there. Even Scully wouldn't question Mulder about that.

So, um, where is it? Where is the context for mainstream news generously provided for free by diligent sources? Where are the challenges to an administration that is as corrupt as any in history? Where is the love? (Of scandal!)

In a recent Associated Press survey, Journalists around the world named the U.S. Election (surprise-surprise!) as the Top Story of 2004. As the entire world watched from a safe distance (bombs in control of the President's "instincts" notwithstanding), the U.S. media from Poughkeepsie to Pasadena sound-bit table-scraps of info and went to work electing their chosen one. The only guaranteed coverage was when one of the candidates when bananas on the other, e.g. Bush accusing Kerry of "flip-flopping" nicely backed up by visuals of adults in dolphin costumes clapping to the theme song from "Flipper"; Kerry almost but not quite accusing Bush of lying...

What the--?

Almost but not quite???

Aw crap! Inside those silk-boxers Kerry was smooth like a G.I. Joe!!! It's Eunuch-Yuppie vs. Ballsy-Cowboy!!! Elton John vs. John Frikkin' Wayne!!!

(sigh)

Okay, great. So then what?

Well, win, lose (or the expected draw) the truth was still out there, and with the litany of charges against Bush rivaling that of Nixon, it is utterly treasonous to America that John Kerry didn't reveal them in detail to the biggest audience possible with the platform and mandate he had. Kerry was the ONLY guy in the last 4 years who could galvanize serious public debate by standing up to the neo-con Bush Administration, as rather bizarrely, "the truth" is lacking in "credibility" and exposure that only he could provide with his high-profile during the election. It was up to Kerry to expose the lies as "lies", and fight for millions of Americans suffering under this administration, millions of people around the world (i.e. in Iraq and Afghanistan), and thousands of soldiers - young men like he was, who are risking their lives in De Ja Vietnam.

Even, and almost especially, he had to fight for the millions of brainwashed Bush supporters currently suffering "battered-lives syndrome", clinging steadfast to the notion that he cares while being ritually abused on nearly every metric. Like battered wives they continue to take their beatings while defending Bush as a "good man" with a "good heart", and grow increasingly loyal as their world is repeatedly shaken by accusations of corruption. Much like leaving any domestic violence situation or cult, it's tough to see your system of beliefs shattered by the truth, so if you decide to stay you need to further strengthen your faith while dismissing even obvious criticism, leaving your soul a Pyrrhic victory pathetically based on a fear of facts.

Bush eagerly jumped in bed with his "base" of fundamentalist Christians, while Kerry merely flirted with his "base" of the passionate hard-left and ABB (Anybody But Bush) activists, who publicly embraced him while frequently showcasing his small balls with their own ballsier messages. Compared to the talking-points echo chamber of the "right", the "left" was a bloody mess. Everyone was uncomfortable as to how to position themselves in sync with a man unsure of where he stood, and one who needed prodding to allude to things that had been driving his supporters crazy for years. Kerry not echoing his most passionate volunteers was not only a tactical error, leading to bad optics for the disorganized Democratic party, it was also a denial of why those supporters were there in the first place, and a grotesque public weakening of the campaign and what always has to be sold as a morally superior position.

Incredibly, with no consistent and direct challenges in the mass-media, the Bush Administration continued to gain legitimacy in the face of numerous scandals (Abu Ghraib, Halliburton, Fahrenheit 9/11, etc.) using a brilliantly sociopathic mantra that was Bart Simpson-esque: "I didn't do it!" In todays information-age, it is inconceivable that any President can get away with as many lies through simple flat-out denial of video-evidence of his very own words, but in the final debate when Kerry challenged him:

Kerry: When the president had an opportunity to capture or kill Osama bin Laden, he took his focus off of them, outsourced the job to Afghan warlords, and Osama bin Laden escaped. Six months after he said Osama bin Laden must be caught dead or alive, this president was asked, "Where is Osama bin Laden?" He said, "I don't know. I don't really think about him very much. I'm not that concerned."
We need a president who stays deadly focused on the real war on terror.

Schieffer: Mr. President?

Bush: Gosh, I just don't think I ever said I'm not worried about Osama bin Laden. It's kind of one of those exaggerations.

Kerry then chose to back down, never mentioning it again. Sure, for those of us who knew the truth it was mildly amusing, but for America to not know with 100% certainty that it was the President of the United States who was at that exact moment lying to them on national TV, was a death-blow to democracy, delivered by John Kerry as yet another sin of omission, and then reflected in silence by the majority of the mass media. With so much ammunition a talking-chimp in a blue power-suit and hundred-dollar haircut could've raised more hell, and it's a damned shame that John Kerry refused to fight, refused to go for the jugular, refused to expose the most disastrous administration in history, refused to challenge voter fraud, and refused to spend the $50 million left in his campaign war chest fighting for the supporters who gave it to him, perhaps saving it for the endless miles of his political obscurity to come.

So, it's over. Oh well, so what if Bush is back in the White House for another 4 years, so what if he has a mandate of 60 million people in middle-America telling the other 6 billion in the world what to do.

How bad could it be?


Epilogue: Skullduggery

I once read a Sports Illustrated story about a college basketball shooting guard who would fix games by imperceptibly giving guys an extra inch (or not) to make shots, and until one of his associates was caught and ratted him out, it was always simply chalked up to better or worse games that he or his opponents had.

Crazy Conspiracy Theory: Bush and Kerry both belong to the Skull and Bones, a Yale secret society. The Skull's goal is power, and so with two Bonesmen in the race? Back the one that is better at amassing power, one who is already getting rid of all that nasty dissent, free-press, social programs, peace (a real Carlyle-quarterly killer), etc., and one who ensures old-money continues to grow at a healthy rate through progressive tax-cuts. He can also divide the country into fighting so bitterly that they can't stand to listen to each other, all while the building blocks of fascism are carefully arranged as the Church, State, and Corporations start aligning under the stewardship of a neo-conservative Federal Government into an unholy union of unquestionable power.

Crazy, eh?

Maybe... (it's only happened a hundred times,) but either way, today it's not only the status-quo of issues we've got to worry about, with these morally bankrupt bastards in charge it can get much, much worse...